Love me some therapy,
The doctoral-type notes she takes make me feel like what I have to say is important,
The sense of comfort feeling that the wisdom of some solution lies on that pad,
Fascinated as I watch how professionally and nonchalantly, she directs the flow of conversation traffic,
Appreciating the significant skill and years of practice this takes,
It is like watching Steph Curry swish from half-court,
Something he makes look easy, however, understanding the years that went into developing such skills.
It is fun vacillating between being a participant and an observer of the session,
The checks and balances she conducts, evaluating specific items and where I stand from the previous session,
Preparing me for what I perceive as upcoming struggles,
Helping me to process past struggles,
Helping me to question and understand my beliefs,
Holding space in a 8 X 8 ft room for connection, acceptance, and empathy,
Teachers and therapists are the professions I respect and admire the most, and often the two are one and the same,
When I feel alone or that there is no good in the world, I step into that room and walk out feeling differently.
Not all therapists are created equal and I feel very blessed for mine. I’ve had two before her and while they added value to my life in their ways, the one I have now is one of the greats. When I first started working with her I was 309 lbs, I was drinking and smoking daily, I was not in school, I was sleeping with random women, shopping to excess, and I was depressed, scared, and in a lot of emotional pain.
Over the last six years by working with her I have lost 60 lbs, I’ve quit drinking and smoking, I’ve gotten a master’s degree and I am almost one year into my PhD program. I’ve gotten a promotion at work. I am medicated and can better manage my emotions and perceptions, I have tools today that work for me. I am no longer using women to numb out.
I am still not exactly where I’d like to be, especially concerning my relationship with money and food and my weight. I still have a hard time managing relationships and making and maintaining meaningful connections in my life. But I know with her coaching and my own diligent continued efforts I will get there.
I am very grateful for each session and the healing and learning that takes place. I am grateful for the inspiration and connection our sessions provide. I hope that this relationship will endure for a good many years to come.
Shaynanigans 