Mental Health · Persona Growth · Recovery

Abusive Relationship With My Mind

I’d been enmeshed in a co-dependent mess,
It was like I didn’t even exist,
We were a dysfunctional whole,
Wherever I went, there you were,
Until a small insignificant moment made me see the toxicity of our relationship,
It wasn’t the mental or emotional abuse I’d enured for years,
Nor the isolation, insecurity, fear, or anxiety you instigated,
All of that had become my normal,
It was the short taste of freedom,
The brief moment of me without you,
For that minute I could breath.
It was then I knew that I wanted you to leave.
Trying to force you to go or change only made the abuse worse,
Things were different though,
I was now aware of the abuse,
Awareness was everything,
Perhaps I couldn’t change you,
But I could change my reaction to you.
I no longer have to engage in your rants,
I have a choice today,
I can separate myself from you whenever I want,
And someday, perhaps I can divorce you for good.

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